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Parenting Choices: When a Parent Crosses the Line

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When a Parent Crosses the Line into another parents territory

To the Mom who thought it was okay to give her 14 year old daughter a joint to share with friends:

Normally I’m not judgmental of other people’s parenting styles. Ultimately we all want what’s best for our children; we just go about things differently and make different parenting choices. 

But when I read your story about giving your daughter her first joint, and your justification that kids are “going to do it anyway” and that this way you could control the fact that it wouldn’t be laced with anything, I was blown away.

Maybe you live in a state where pot is legal. Regardless of where you live though, it’s illegal for those under the age of 21. Your 14 year old daughter is NOT of age.  To encourage her is simply reckless in my opinion. That’s what you did, you know. You gave her the green light to smoke pot.

Your job is to be her PARENT, not her friend. Here’s a newsflash…contrary to what your daughter told you, not every kid in her school is getting high. Not even close. And even if  “everyone else” was doing it, it doesn’t make it right. 

If you openly keep pot in the house, and your daughter knows where the unlocked stash is kept, obviously she’s going to think pot use is perfectly acceptable. Why wouldn’t she? Dad and Mom use it. 

But this is not about your parenting choices, which I completely disagree with. It’s none of my business. 

It’s about the fact that you gave your daughter illegal drugs to SHARE with two other friends, whose parents had no knowledge of this.

It’s about that fact that your daughter brought illegal drugs into SOMEONE ELSE’S HOME. 

[Tweet “Illegal is illegal. Don’t make the choice for another parent, via @dishofdailylife  #DrugUse”]

What were you thinking? What gives you the right to decide for another parent? 

If I was that other parent, I would be livid. 

Here’s some food for thought. Think of it from the other side of things.

  • How would you feel if someone gave your kid access to drugs without you knowing? 
  • How would you feel if something happened to your child or another because of your carelessness? 

I have a feeling that you didn’t really think your decision all the way through. At least that’s what I hope. 

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Jenny B

Wednesday 1st of July 2015

I love finding your older posts - especially gems like this one. I am not a parent myself, but I was obviously a teenager once. I disagree with her parenting choices, but that's not the worst part - the author of that article has no right to decide what is right for other people's children. My mother would have been furious if some other parent thought it was okay to give me pot. Part of me wants to say she wrote that post just for blog traffic.

Michelle Nahom

Wednesday 1st of July 2015

That's what I felt like too. I normally stay away from controversy, but having kids in that same age range...it made me really mad. If I had been that other parent, I would have been livid.

Kristi Campbell

Saturday 2nd of August 2014

OMG. I hadn't heard of this and am blown away. Totally inexcusable. Seriously - so it's not "laced with anything?" I'd be furious!!! Dang. Seriously.

Sarah

Wednesday 30th of July 2014

WOW! Shocked! What happens at age 16? They give her a needle full of herion. I know all kids experiment. I just think it happens when they are older! WOW. I'm shocked!

Michelle Nahom

Thursday 31st of July 2014

That's the thing, for some kids, this is the stepping stone to move on to other things. And some of those other things are even scarier!

Tricia

Tuesday 29th of July 2014

Oh my goodness! I had not heard about this and I honestly can't even conceive of such a thing. Speechless.

Michelle Nahom

Thursday 31st of July 2014

That's how I felt too, Tricia. And then really upset. I would be livid if another parent knowingly gave her kid illegal drugs to share with mine because "everyone is doing it." Which of course, they're not! She should be a little concerned about who her daughter is hanging out with.

Keitha The Bajan Texan

Monday 28th of July 2014

No freaking way that really happened! I swear some people just should never have kids, thats just nuts!

Michelle Nahom

Thursday 31st of July 2014

I was shocked too...I wouldn't give it to my kid in the first place, but I'm not her parent. But to allow her to take it out of the house and share it with friends...that part really bothered me.