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Who Are Your 4 am Friends?

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The last time I wrote about our Birthday Club, one of our husbands read my post and found it touching.  Unbeknownst to his wife, at Christmas, he had t-shirts made up for all of us. (Thank you Paul – it was a great surprise!) The shirts have a picture of a birthday cake on them and reads:

The Birthday Club

“You have been my friend, that in itself is a tremendous thing.” ~E.B. White, Charlotte’s Web


Last night the Birthday Club celebrated another birthday.  The age doesn’t matter..we’re not getting any younger. But we’re enjoying life. We’re blessed by so many different things, including our friendship with each other.

Last night’s dinner was no different than any other’s…our conversations are all over the place, with topics ranging from a funny defective mattress story to random acts of kindness to “every plant needs to be watered,” and as funny as that one was, I’m not going there in this post!  Too much sangria, perhaps?

One of us who is going through a really difficult time told us about an act of kindness she experienced this Christmas.  She’s one of the strongest people I know, and these past couple of years have been beyond difficult for her family. I won’t relay her story for her privacy, but it takes a very strong person to rise to the challenges she has risen to. In explaining to her children about the act of kindness that was bestowed upon them, she told them that someday they will be in a position to help someone else, and that she hoped they would do so when that occasion arose.  It’s a wonderful lesson for all of us…take help when you need it, in whatever form it comes, and give it back when you have the opportunity to do so.

We’re hearing about acts of kindness everywhere these days, which is really uplifting!  Another one of us brought out an envelope she recently received to show us.  It came with $80 tucked inside of it, but no note and no return address.  She was completely surprised…it was so unexpected! I love hearing about acts of kindness.  They don’t need to involve money…it could be as simple as letting the person in line behind you at the grocery store go in front of you.

The mattress story, on the other hand, had us in stitches.  Apparently a custom mattress was purchased, tailored to his and her sleep needs.  Her side is great; he’s been complaining about his since day 1.  Since it was based on a sleep number, my friend told her husband he’d get used to it…after all, it was made especially for him!  Months went by and he continued to complain that he’s not sleeping well, but did nothing about it.  Then my friend went away for a night and her husband slept on her side of the bed.  He got a good night’s sleep and didn’t want to give her side back!  So she slept on his side. How bad could it be? One night was enough…she said it was like sleeping on rocks!  But he won’t trade back, having had the best night’s sleep that he’s had in months, so she moved to the guest room rather than endure another night on the “rocks”!  So first thing yesterday morning, she called the mattress company to complain.  Hopefully a new mattress will be coming soon!

Having “girlfriends” is important.  It’s nice to have someone who you know you can count on to help you out in a pinch (or when you are knee deep in mud) or who you can call to just talk when you need to. A true friend is someone who you don’t have to see all the time to know they will be there for you. I recently read a quote from Marlene Dietrich that I loved: “It is the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.” Here’s to some great 4 am friends!